And here we go again

I picked up the play last night - after putting it down however many months ago. I cut a lot. I cut a WHOLE lot and added some.

There are sections that need to be reworked and the whole thing needs to be polished. But, I am actually liking it more now. It took me a while to figure it out, but I have realized that things that I saw as nice, but not necessary would be seen in very much the same way by an audience. So, as much as it pained me to cut some of my favorite songs...

It had to be done.

I'm BACK!

After leaving the Susan Werner work on the back burner for a while (where it will stay until I figure out the next steps) I have started work on a NEW project!

That's right! I am writing another one! This one is not a musical and has nothing to do with Susan Werner - not a thing! The idea - small as it was at the time - occurred to me a few months ago while I was still reeling from the death of my director from AMDA. I kept seeing her, hearing her, remembering her. And after a while, I started learning more about who she was, how she was, her passions. One of them was equal treatment for homosexuals. This was obvious - but to hear how people described how she fought... wow. So I'm writing a new piece - trying not to copy her life as I do not want to make anyone uncomfortable.

Up until yesterday night... okay, this morning, I only had an inkling - no real idea of how anything would progress - just that stuff would happen and there would be people. Great. Who wouldn't want to see that?

Person 1: Hi. Did you know stuff is happening?
Person 2: No. I was completely unaware.
Person 1: Well, now you know.
Person 2: Yes. Yes, I do. Thank you, citizen.
Person 1: You are most assuredly welcome, friend.
Person 3: (Entering) Whoa! Look at all that stuff happening over there!
Person 2: Yes, we were just discussing all the stuff.
Person 1: It is truly remarkable.

Actually, I might be on to something, there. It's almost Godot-esque... in a not-at0all-close kind of way.

So, I write. Outlining has begun and snippets of scenes are slowly getting scribbled down. I am excited.

s'been a while

Just a quick note to let you all know... if you'd like to read any of my work it can be found HERE.

It starts again...

I went to an AMAZING concert on the 6th. Susan Werner and Trina Hamlin rocked it out as usual. I spoke to Susan after the show and she suggested some great books about writing and told me that while she liked the script and thinks I write like people talk, there needs to be a little more conflict at certain points. So, now I'm back to writing. But, after almost two straight weeks of over thinking how to do it, I may have figured it out.

So the process that is the SECOND draft begins...

ok then

just got an email from Susan.

"ok read the whole script and enjoyed it plenty"

went on to say that I write the way people talk and all these great things about how she liked it. SHE LIKED IT!!!!!!

I am in a state of shock right now.

next!

I mailed the script to Susan this morning. I also emailed a friend, Dan, to see if he is able to help me turn lead sheets and mp3s into actual sheet music for the book.

The script won't get to Susan until probably Thursday, maybe Friday. I don't expect a response from Dan right away... So now, I wait.

I've spent the past ten days scrambling.

Print it out, hold a reading, change it, change it again, and again, and again... print it, find formatting errors, reprint it, bind it, read it, TRY to write a personal note to Susan which is WAY hard when you're trying to be eloquent and concise, email, email again... all while working full-time and entertaining my nieces and nephew who are in town for the first time in four years with my sister and brother in-law... Oddly enough, I am not tired. I am wound up and wish that it was already Thursday or Friday or next week - or the concert on August 6th, so I could see Susan's face when she says "I loved it" or "I hated it" or whatever.

Maybe I should go for a run... okay a walk.

So...

I held a table read today. There are five females and four male characters, the table read cast consisted of me, Kelly, Siobhan, and Dan. That's right, three women and one men.

And oddly enough - it didn't suck!

I came home, with loads of edits to do... songs to cut, lines to move, LOTS AND LOTS OF FORMATTING!

But it only took a few minutes to do. So now it is final. As final as I can get it right now. Now all I need to do is convert music lead sheets to sheet music and put them into the book. Yeah - not hard at all... HA!

But, I will submit it now to the local theatres because that way, they can tell me if they will do it and have plenty of time to plan ahead for it.

Mailing it out to Susan this week!

I swear...

there are no words to describe this feeling.

I'm done. Really. Really? REALLY! I wrote a play. I wrote a WHOLE PLAY! I have wanted to do this for so long. So many times, I would try. It got too hard. I got stuck. It felt wrong, forced, boring... and I would quit. But I'm done. I did it.

15,055 words
110 pages
10 characters
2 Acts
1 story.

And it's mine.

I emailed Susan yesterday to let her know. She sent me some song lead sheets and said she'd look for the rest that I need. I told her not to rush.

Now, I have one more double-check edit to do; and then I want to have some people read it out loud so I can HEAR it and make sure it's right and then it gets printed, bound, and mailed off to Susan for her stamp of approval. They are her songs, it's only fair.

But even if nothing comes of this - even if it only go as far as a Small community theatre, if that far, I wrote it.

These past few weeks I have faced moving out of the home in which I grew up, watching it be sold to people I didn't know and didn't trust; I have dealt with the craziness that is being twenty-eight and too poor to pay my bills AND rent so I still live with my mother; the death of a wonderful teacher and mentor whom I miss daily and is the subject of my next play; financial crises... this play, this piece of writing allowed me to get away. It provided me with a much-needed catharsis. It was a HUGE reminder that I am intelligent and capable of doing awesome things. It was a shining beacon of joy. I'm almost sad I'm done.

But I am so satisfied.

Wow

I am just amazed. I sit here, tired, hot and thirsty... ECSTATIC! Because I am literally almost done.

I have a few transitions to work out, a few scenes to lengthen and another vignette to write out. Then, it all gets typed up and (drum roll, please) I am DONE!

In a matter of days, maybe hours... I will be able to say that I am finished. Granted, I will need to edit. There will be necessary changes, additions, cuts, etc... but I will have written it.

It's amazing. Lately, and I will admit that it could be due to the ridiculous heatwave, I've been feeling a bit down. I'm struggling with money issues and it is getting really tough to hold out hope that I will figure it out, though somehow I always do. But this has been my piece of joy. This piece has been such a wonderful thing. I've spent serious time thinking, writing, listening. I've been listening to the music, listening to the words, letting them inform the piece.

I am so excited. I get to email Susan and tell her that I'm done. DONE! I will have finished something. I will have accomplished something.

uh oh

I looked over Act 2 just now. It's coming along. Scenes are slowly getting checked off. GREAT! I have already input all of the songs. I have more writing to do, of course. But once I'm done - I;m pretty sure that Act 2 will only be 30 pages WITH songs. I find this very funny. Act 1 hovers around 60. I mean, I know that the first act is always longer than the second. All the conflicts and back stories get set up in the first act. That's where we learn who's related; attracted to; in cahoots with; in love with; afraid of; angry at... whom.

IT TAKES TIME, DAMMIT!

Act 2 is where all the ends that came loose in Act 1 get tied up again. Think of it as a child's playroom. There are toys in large Tupperware bins. Blocks; Dolls; Kitchen; dress-up; etc... Now, Tommy two-year-old comes in and, being two years old, dumps ALL the bins out and spreads the mess around the room. But he goes one bin at a time. He dumps out the blocks and plays for a few minutes, gets bored, dumps out the dolls, etc... That's ACT 1.

But now it's nap time and the floor is full of toys. So, he has to clean up. A two year-old's version of clean up is clear a space. So the toys eventually make their way back into bins. Everything looks neat and tidy, even if it isn't. At least everything is put somewhere, in A place, if not it's PROPER place. Now, he can nap peacefully. That is ACT 2. It doesn't matter if dolls are in with blocks and the kitchen things are all in the dress-up bin while the bin specifically MARKED KITCHEN is empty. Sometimes, at the end of a play, someone comes up empty. It doesn't matter, so long as the conflicts that involved them are somehow resolved. Resolution isn't always resolution. Sometimes it's just a matter of someone accepting that they aren't going to be happy. It isn't wonderful for that person, but they usually deserve it - or the audience needs that, so that they can actually come away from it having LEARNED what the writer intended.

But, still. A two year-old is cleaning up REALLY quickly in this play. Hmmm... Cutting stuff out is pretty easy. Adding stuff, when you have all you need? Not so much.

T - 5

Five scenes are all that stand between me and being done with a first draft! I sent Act 1 back out to Kelly today. I can't tell if the edits I did made it better or worse. I think they made it better. But now there might be one or two smaller details that I cut out. Easily fixed.

I had started to doubt the song choices in the beginning - but the edits made them work. I needed to heighten the urgency in some scenes. I think I did that. Fab.

So, now it is on to vignettes.

I almost feel bad though. There are ten people in t his play. But the ones who do most of the talking and all of the singing are the women. The men are there and I think they have a good presence. But these are Midwestern farmers here, they don't talk much and they certainly wouldn't sing.

I'm pretty excited to finish. The house is now occupied by more than just me, so I must be off to somewhere else where I can think.

onward...

figured out so great stuff tonight. SO THRILLED!

Now, I would be happy to figure out a difficult scene anyway. But, as I keep writing, I find more things that make me smile.

This whole process is so circular. First, I write, then I get stuck, then I start to think that the piece is getting away from me, then I get an idea, and it works, then I write, then I get stuck...

WAHOO!

So tonight I sat, thinking "I WILL NEVER GET THIS RIGHT! I WAS INSANE TO THINK I COULD DO THIS! WHY DID I EVER SUGGEST THIS IDEA?"

But then I moved one little piece and it works again. And I am back to being thrilled.

I swear, this play is making me bipolar.

WHY DOES THIS ALWAYS HAPPEN?

I know where this piece is going. I know what happens, I know what is said, who says it... but I don't feel like writing it down.

Am I that much of a pathetic loser that once I figure something out - I don't need to finish it?

"Oh, I know where those last 100 pieces of that 11000-piece puzzle go, no need to put them together, I can already IMAGINE what it looks like completed."

I mean, really?

Fight or Flight...

This isn't REALLY about the play - not really.

I got my Property tax bills today. Yes, I said bills. Apparently, the tax Assessor think I still own the Dodge Neon I sold last year. No big deal. I'm sure I can work that one out. I can easily go to the DMV and call the business that bought the car and get everything sorted out. But the tax on the car I DO own went up. It went up by over $100. I understand that the TAX went up but that's a lot. Don't cars depreciate over time?

I will admit, the bills from last year fell through the cracks. I forgot about them. I am paying them this week. Maybe after I do that the Tax people will be willing to let me pay in installments for the rest. I would hope so.

Now, why am I writing about this on this blog? Well, the main character is partly based on me. I wonder if she's the same way about this. I got those bills and felt sick immediately. It's a learned response. I find I owe money and I feel sick. I hate that. I face bills I can pay and freak out as if I can't.

Would Kate do that? Maybe she did and now she's over it.

Not exactly breaking NEWS

I spoke to Susan a few days ago. There is another woman in West Virginia who wants to write a musical based entirely on The Gospel Truth, one of Susan's albums. Susan, being the considerate person she is, immediately contacted me to give me a heads up and see if it was okay.

She's offered me advice, suggestions, thoughts... I love it. There were things I was worried about, small concerns really, but it was still a huge relief to hear that everything was fine the way I was doing it.

Mainly, I was concerned that she might be upset if I changed a lyric or two. There aren't many changes I've HAD to make, but there are some. They are all for continuity, none because I simply thought it sounded better. So, when I asked her if that was alright, I was THRILLED when she got back saying "patti do what u want to do with lyric changes and if i can't take it i'll rewrite them with and for you to make the piece work. don't sweat that." You read that right "with and for". AWESOME!

I have never met a more accommodating person. She keeps reminding me, this is my piece - I can do with it what I want. She's honored. That's her word, not mine.

So the work continues.

Thinking small

Act 2 is now completely blocked out. I've added... a LOT! All very little vignettes. This makes me happy. I like vignettes. For one thing, they're short. I don't have to fill page after page after page with dialogue. Additionally, they are sweet. They are tiny morsals of information that are easy to follow and they allow for a better and freer flow for the words. It's amazing how chaacters can grow and say more, faster, when they actually speak and do less.

There are about seventeen vignettes in the Act. I know that seems like a lot, but some of these scenes are a minute long - if that. Some scenes are made up of three or four smaller bits that get strung together by a song. I'm excited.

Oh - Brill!

Not.

I started thinking a few days ago that I wasn't too keen on some of the names I had chosen for the characters in the piece. They weren't bad - but it simply wasn't working as well as I thought it could.

So, I changed some.

And now - as I TRY to write, I keep using the old names. Habits. They die hard.

If I would just suck it up and type up the 6 pages I have scribbled down that might be decent and the three more that are pretty awful... but have potential, I might actually get somewhere.

I need a device. I have to figure out why one of the women is such a judgmental bitch. I know part of it, but I can't figure out the rest of it. It feels forced and trite and I am getting upset.

It is also pretty late - or early. Maybe I'm just tired. I have a HUGE number of days off next week and I plan on using them to my fullest advantage. I want to go somewhere. But where? And with what money? I think that maybe a change of scenery would help me see the through line clearer.

I spoke to Susan a few days ago. She gave me some ideas, suggestions, answers to some questions I'd posed. She also asked if I ever sleep. It made me remember; even if nothing comes of this, even if this little piece of mine never goes beyond a small community theatre somewhere in Fairfield County, CT, that's okay. I'll have written it. I'll have made a contribution.

And then, at least I hope, the NEXT one might be easier to write.

Coming together...

I went back and changed Act 1 a little. It's feeling better to me now.

Act 2 is... well, I'm just not motivated. I'll get there. I have a busy day today but can probably get to the Library before it closes for some writing time. The outline that I have is good. But it wasn't finished when I started writing. Once I did, the outline changed... False starts, three. It makes it hard to keep it all straight.

And it is HOT today! Very.

I think I can, I think I can, I think I can...

I actually KNOW I can. I'm just out of steam. I am physically exhausted lately. I am getting together with Kelly tonight and that should get things moving again.

I have a good start on scenes for Act 2. I started it a few times and reworked as I went. All I need to really do is type up what I have. I'm just. so. tired.

I think I will take a shower and a nap. Maybe I can type the few pages I have up after that.

Whoop it up!

Act 2 is blocked out. I know, this is probably not as thrilling for you as it is for me. I don't really care.

I figured it out... and have started to run out of steam. I think I'm just tired. Whatev- I'm allowed a break. Right?

ok now...

I'm kind of stuck.

I just finished blocking out Act 2. It's only 8 scenes long. Now, granted, it is only an outline and it can grow. There are 7 songs which can easily take up some time. BUT, with a first Act being 13 scenes long, even though some of them are connected without fade outs, and some are really short... I wonder. I suppose that I should just write.

Not bad

Without ANY songs or setups for scenes, Act 1 is 49 pages long. At this point, the songs for Act 1 run about 30 minutes, start to finish, with no edits and no talking over intros... SWEET! Act 1 is JUST over an hour! If one or two songs get widdled down a bit, and another one or two get done a beat or two faster than before, and ALL of them start while the actors are talking (which they always do) that's an EASY ten minutes shaved off right there.

Now, should I finish Act 2 before I ask Susan for sheet music or ask her now as I think she is on a short hiatus?

I should probably wait. I think I'll just keep going. I can finish and give it to her and THEN ask for sheet music - which, she might not even have.

I said when I started this blog, that I really liked this process and was daunted by it. I haven't said that in a while - bit it is still true. I really do love this process. Despite all the hangups, all the weird things... I love it. A lot.

There is still work to be done, I'm only half-done with half of what I need to do. And there is more to do on the side. But the writing is there. Everyone who has read it, likes it. I'm excited about that. They liked it before I edited it. Before I made necessary changes and cleaned it up considerably.

They liked it.

hmmmmm...

Act 2 is basically blocked out. Pretty sweet. Act 1 is in edits. There are two characters that I think need to be more fleshed out. BUT I am on a serious time limit. The Act is 59 pages long as it is right now. I can only add so much stuff...

Um... Kelly?

WAHOO!

After much debating in my head which kept me WIDE awake until 5 am... um, yesterday CRAP! I have finally, I think, I hope, I - dare I say it? pray that I have figured it out.


What was once 81 pages is now 60 pages. Sweet. What did I cut? Things I didn't like. Things I didn't like were necessary or did not plan to resolve in Act 2 and a HUGE chunk of the last scene that, while it was good, felt forced and off somehow. FUNNY - but not quite right.

So maybe I am moving on. Act 2 is calling me. I have a little bit of it written, but it is giving me the same grief that Act 1 did at the beginning.

ok

Now that Act One is finished... I can UN-finish it.

When I left the computer last night, after adding in some things I thought I needed, I realized that the script is already eighty-one pages long. Um... that's a lot.

Usually, you factor about one minute per page for a straight play. Musicals take a little longer because a song, that could easily fit onto one page, can take up to three or four minutes... Hmmm.

Now, it is already cut down to seventy-one pages.

I need to cut a lot more. Dammit.

WHOA!

Act one is DONE! Yes! DONE! As in finished. COMPLETE!

NO WAY!

It had given me trouble... I knew how the last scene ended, but I had no idea how exactly it was supposed to START. That's kinda important. But I managed to start it. And now, I have finished it.

Now, I have just four more hand-written pages to type up - it shouldn't take too long. As I heard the characters talking, I rushed to write it all down. My writing got bigger... and messier. But I can still decipher what I wrote down.

Then it is off to edit and critique.

Kelly, Laura, Tamara - watch your inboxes...

Timeline

I realize that I should probably include a timeline of some sort. It strikes that this is taking a very small amount of time. It is not that I am not thinking it out or working hard... just that the characters have been nice to me thus far and have not kept many secrets from me or hidden in the shadows somewhere... maybe only one or two times.

April 25: Meet Susan Werner, get approval to write play
April 26 - May 1: Begin to block out general idea.
May 2 - 29: Write approximately 1/3 of what is now Act 1.
May 30 - June 2: Take a major (almost too long) break to get my head around Claudia's death.
June 3 - now: complete Act 1 and begin working on Act 2.

If all goes well, I hope to have Act 2 complete by mid to late July and have everything edited and in the second draft stage by early August to give to Susan when she is in MA for another concert. If I can't, she'll be in New Haven in September, so I do have a little bit of time. I do not want to mail it to a gig somewhere. I need to hand it to her. I can't explain why.

13 down, 1 to go

Act One has 13 scenes... WHAT?! 13 scenes and 7 songs (not counting the underscoring pieces and the one that Kate sings only a piece of unaccompanied).

13!!

All that is left is one MAJOR scene... the last of the Act. It is the scene where everything hits the fan. Everybody argues, people cry... epic family drama. It's almost Greek. Maybe. I could just be saying that to make myself sound more intelligent.

As soon as it is done and typed up I will email it to a small group of people for edits and critiques. Then it is on to Act Two which I have already started to write and completed song selection (I think).

Productivity

There is much to be done. Act one now has a first scene. But, after a week of crying and taking too long of a break, I am finding it difficult to get back into the swing on things. This, I am sure, will pass.

The characters are growing - this I like to see. It never ceases to amaze me when people that I create take on lives and minds of their own and say/do things I wouldn't have originally thought they would.

I am sure that this would be a bit easier if I could find my notebook. I was smart enough to type up all of the scenes before I lost it, but it DOES have the outline in it, the one I like, so I really need to find it. I need to find it today.

I think I will go to the Westconn library this afternoon. It is pretty quiet and, now that graduation is over, there will be fewer people. Pretty sweet. I got a lot done in that building when I went to Western CT State, so maybe this will be good.

I have one additional piece of writing and a closer deadline. June 25 is the last day that I can send in my tribute letter for Claudia to AMDA. In addition to my notebook, I have to find my good stationery.

Wish me luck.

Back to it

After some days off, I am getting back to the writing. I have to finish. I am already planning out the NEXT play I want to write. I have no idea really how it will end up...

So, the play continues.

ok now

I am feeling better. I learned, read, and cried a lot since hearing of Claudia's death on Sunday. She'd been fighting non-Hodgkin's lymphoma since last year and was doing well. But, when she started to have physical issues suddenly, they did an MRI and found lesions on the brain. She bravely decided against the 2 month-long treatment that would be horrible to endure, might not work, would only add another 6 months if it worked at all, and could leave her in a vegetative state. She was transferred to hospice care and died peacefully in her wife's arms.

Beautiful.

Claudia would be disappointed if she knew how much time I had wasted, and will keep wasting, crying. She would be angry if she knew that I wasn't writing because I was too busy thinking about her. She would be supportive, tell me that "Change is good" and then ask me "What are you going to do about this?"

I am going to write.
I am going to finish.
I am going to dedicate this to Claudia. She'd think that's silly. She would tell me to leave her out of it.

And I would ignore that direction.

right now, it is all I can think about.

I can't write.
I can't concentrate.
My favorite director -
the woman I wanted to be,
the woman who knew what I could do before I did,
but never told me,
so I could realize it myself -
is dead.

"She wasn't feeling well, got some blood work which revealed cancer.
Soon, she slipped into a coma and never woke up."

I have to believe she chose to go that way.
I have to.

Nobody told Claudia Asbury what to do.
Nobody.

I miss her.
I loved her.

I remember her saying something to me after my last show -
something about how I was talented -
but I can't remember what she said.
I hate that I can't remember what she said and therefore,
if she really said it.

I suppose it doesn't matter.
I knew her.
I learned from her.

Goodbye.

Claudia Asbury was a Sophisticated Lady.

Getting it done

Script is coming together, I am thrilled to say.

THRILLED, I TELL YOU!

So far, I have written about 1/4 of the first act... maybe a 1/3? I'm not really sure at the moment as I keep adding and cutting. BUT what I have written is slowly being typed up. Formatting a play is NOT all that fun but it does look pretty good. Right now, there are two scenes written in long-form that I still need to type up. But then, I am all caught up and can keep going.

I like this process. This, I find odd. I usually get to the point where I hate it - it gets too hard, I get stuck - and, because I have nothing riding on it, I quit. But the fact that people know I am doing this, others are involved... the keeps me at it. Notice, I did not say I keep going because of Susan. I know the woman is far too busy to pay attention to this right now. That's why I was given the go-ahead in the first place.

I was just telling a friend a few days ago that I missed college. I LOVED college. I loved the discussions, debates, lectures... I even loved writing papers. I was SUCH a nerd! Only, unlike most nerds, I sucked at taking notes. Whatever. I am writing again. I will say it again, I like this process.

1. Write out notes/outline for scene
2. Write scene
3. Realize that what I wrote is pretty frickin' awful
4. Rearrange, cut, add, scrap, re-try
5. Get stuck
6. Start again
7. Write out scene, long-hand, in about 10 minutes
8. Wonder what the hell took so long
9. Have a third party (read, Kelly) read what I have to double-check it for consistency.
10. Type it up, editing while I go.

I realized yesterday that I sort of forgot to write the opening scene. Oops. That's not a huge problem as it is not a huge scene. Still, I do think that it is pretty funny. I will have to double-back for it.

Sweet!

I am starting to think that the Windmill Diner is really good luck. That's where I've been BOTH times I ended up figuring out a scene that gave me nothing but trouble and ended up be fabulous. And it's not just me! Kelly came by today and read what I had scribbled down. When she came back, she said (drum roll, please)...

"I love it. It's great."

AWESOME!

I am starting to really understand these characters. And the ideas keep coming.

I have also decided to just write. Before, I was thinking more about the songs and trying to make the story fit them. NOW - I have finally figured out how to just write and let the story go where it goes and allow the songs to fit into that later on.

...next

I have now finally... and I mean FINALLY figured out a scene. It was a bitch. Seriously. First draft (of that scene) - done. Moving on.

coming together

Slowly blocking out new scenes. There are characters that are giving me trouble. I don't understand them yet. Lots and lots of characters sketches have been done. I will surely do more. Boo. They are not as fun as you might expect. I understand the main character. She's intelligent, funny, witty... me. You know - that's how I roll.

But, in general, I am getting this done.

I start typing it all up very soon. I think once I do that, I will know more about what I have or - I fear - what I don't have.

I am excited, though. Very. Here we go.

Procrastination

I have now learned that if I cannot write a scene, it is better to put it off and work on something else first.

I also get to drink! This I can get in to!

See, here's the thing. There is a scene that happens in a bar. I never go to bars... ever. So, how the hell am I supposed to write something that happens in one without going out for a drink? I CAN'T! So, drinks will be had. Not so many that I slur my writing. Not by a long-shot.

BUT I am piecing it more and more.

While looking around for new opportunities, new projects, new everything... FUN TIMES!

...um

I'm stuck. I have the next scene I need to finish at least partly blocked out. I know what happens in general. I understand the scene after that better. I can't stop thinking about the scene I have already written - it isn't quite right. And I know what will make it better, but then - will I be up-ending entire pieces? This is a bit like a Sodoku puzzle that I've messed up. I know that there was a mistake at some point, but how many other mistakes has it caused me to make?

starting to find answers

"Have you been so inspired you couldn't get to sleepin'?"
- Susan Werner
"Attend the Sky"

Yes. Yes, I have.

Last night, while I TRIED to sleep at 1:30 am... a scene started to write itself. No matter how hard I tried... the characters keep going in my head. The songs kept playing over and over.

I've been playing with this piece for about a month now. The plot has grown, moved, changed, been expanded, streamlined... I'm digging it. A lot.

Act One gave me trouble.

How do I do this?
CAN I do this?
What is the right way to do this?
Should I just do it my way? (Stop the Frank Sinatra in your head)

After several hours with Kelly, texts and phone calls to Laura, and some discussions that didn't really have anything to do with the play... Act One is outlined.

Of course, I expect it to change a bit more. But I actually like what I've got. I have thrown in some of the most seemingly ridiculous conflicts... I mean, these people are kind of screwed up. But I love them.

I've got a few scenes written, long-hand, in a notebook. If it weren't such a royal pain in the ass to get the formatting done properly, they would already be typed up. But that will happen.

This will all happen.

I just meant to listen

On Sunday, 25 April 2010... my life changed.

I had simply meant to attend a small concert in Ridgefield, CT. Susan Werner was in town - and wouldn't be back in the area until the middle of next year. I had bought the Live at Passim album late in 2008 and addded the Gospel Truth to my collection shortly thereafter. Months of listening to her exclusively passed and I realized that there was a story to be told in the songs. I bought more, the story grew. Her music is infectious and I love her. So I paid the $17 and drove the 20 minutes down the road.

When I arrived, I got the idea... "I should take notes." I don't know what made me think that. But I wanted to write down my observations. I went back to my car and when I returned to the room, the seat I had originally wanted was taken. So I walked to the front row, where there were four seats, one all the way at the end, on the left and sat there.

Susan walked out and immediately started in on her set. She went seemlessly from Kicking the Beehive to a song from The Gospel Truth (for whatever reason, I can't remember which one, though I think it was Did Trouble Me - I know this from my notes:
"Christians, Jews, Hindus, Agnostics, all of us - nodding in agreement - this is truly amazing.).

And I sat, ecstatic to just BE there, taking my notes. After the first two, she stopped to talk about the imspirations behind them and then she turned and looked at me and said "What are you writing? Are you grading me? Oh, yeah that one was good. Not so much the other one." I spoke up and said no, I was just taking notes. In fact, I was the one who suggested that someone write a musical around some of her songs. And she perked up. "Oh!" turning to the audience she said "She's my friend on facebook. She thinks that there's a play in my songs." Then she turned back to me and said "I'm gonna come talk to you at intermission." AND SHE DID!

Now, as we spoke, it was more about my aspirations to build programs for children that teach open communication (she has already set me up with a contact in California who wants to help me out) BUT THAT IS NOT THE POINT! I made her laugh and she is "honored" that I want to write the musical... on which she gave me the go-ahead AND free reign ("I'm too close to it. Don't tell me. Just write it.")

So now the process starts... A while back, a friend decided to quit her job and write a book that would not leave her alone. She blogged about it. Another friend wrote an entire novel for National Novel Writing Month. 50,000 words in 30 days. She wrote about it on facebook. BOTH of them are hugely inspirational to me.

I am daunted.
I am ecstatic.
I am a writer.